feelings of impending doom

i can't help shake this bad feeling i have. i am sure it is related to Kirby's seizure and the uncertainity of it all. watching her hobble about. she can barely get off the floor when she lays down as she is quite weak. i was told some of that is due to her medications. still it is very upsetting and makes me feel weepy for her. i feel angry too because we all know that our pets will leave us some day, but yet it still seems so friggin unfair. i've dealt with so much loss that i am sure it contributes to all these feelings. she'll be seeing a vet again next friday to draw levels of phenobarbital and check her blood pressure. she needs to adjust to these new meds and that is important for me to remember - that she's medicated. i still hate it all.